Lindsey Dawn Mckenzie 16 Life is Beautiful

Day was born October 24 Pelayo.
My brother, the miracle that was waiting.
My mother went into labor two days ahead of schedule, was scheduled cesarean section, but the boy decided he would know before the world.
and at 4 and 15 pm and was here with us, torn from his little dark and warm, ready to meet wonderful and terrible things that have this life.
We saw my brother 16 years and my green robes and masks, and into the incubator room, the patient took us to our own, and I held my breath because it was there.
it naked and perfect, two wrinkled feet, two hands with long fingers, a head with soft brown hair cLaro, their tiny eyelashes, her small flat nose and heart shaped lips, so similar to mine.
I cried seeing the little miracle in front of him, I welcomed the world and looked at every inch of your skin, loving it more every time.
This baby came when most needed, when life is suffocating me, and now I can not believe I'm at my side, and whisper softly to cojerlo 'I love you Pelayo, you are so special and important to me' And just for

this, I decided that life is precious, and this is my little miracle baby, who will take care of the tooth and nail and always will love him as far as giving me strength.
And this is your entry, the entry of my little Pokemon, my brother, Pelayo. CHT

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time ago I did not connect to MSN, because she had a phobia. (?)
Today I remembered the reason for that feeling, not knowing what to say in conversations and others, and I said then: Bah, not as serious fuck.
But if that gets it done.
As in the fucking Msn, not see his face, gestures and tone in which they are the whores phrases, you misunderstand everything, and ride a fucking pifostio of .
That's the real reason.

about two years ago I was angry with one of my best friends for something she said or something I said.
And we were days without speaking, we are proud of both. And

hac

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People think this is nothing but misery and desperation and death and all that shit that should not be forgotten.
But what they forget is the pleasure that involved.
Otherwise we would not, after all we are not assholes shit, well ... at least not as asshole.
Take the greatest orgasm you ever had, multiply it by a thousand and not even close will walk.
When you're hooked one Preo cern: Pillar .
And when you release suddenly have to worry about a lot of other shit :
- I have no money I can not get fart.
- I have money : Bebo too.
- not get a chorvo : Not actually a powder.
- I have a chorvo : Too overwhelmed.
have to worry about bills, food, some fucking football team that never wins, personal relationships and all things that really do not care when you are genuine and truly hooked on parrot.
CHTMLX

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my step, to be special.
Now from what I've noticed is that the princess never thought I was.
I do not consider myself special.
I constantly seek love for others, when I do not want myself.
I purr like a cat when I find.

I've never been a real princess, because I've always believed that he deserved.
Now I do not want to be a princess, I just want to know:
If I just sit on the floor to watch the world go ...
anyone would sit next to me?

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XC .......
- Have you seen the movie Closer? Natalie Portman, according to his obituary, disarmed people.
- people I disarmed?
- I do.


would never hurt anyone.
hurt me Alone with myself.

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I know I write too long, but since this is a diary of urgency and emergency say because only turn to him when I have nobody else to ask or tell you what I get for the head, surely nobody take this into account.

When you begin to realize that you ask too much of a person who is not obliged to give you anything?
I think now grazed the edge of a person who, without knowing why, I have taken into consideration even in my daily life.
I say consider because it is the best way you can 'treat' to a person, understand their needs, respect their wishes and can say that ... Delete? Some of yours just for their happiness. CHTM

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What can you expect from this post? Another input
pathetic and boring, terribly boring as I find myself in these moments of my life.
I continue with the yoga and the swimming pool and starving for places to download all the kilos of duck only because I cojido the damn adorable agoraphobia and mustard-colored couch in my living room. All that We expect the nasty pills that have made me go fuck this weight all night by the water. There could be a fate worse so I decided that I would avenge them that way. And slowdown in the water, amarrilas and bitter pills swallowed the water, as he also needs to stabilize her mood and the background I'm doing you a favor.
I'm bored

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t, my vein solidarity has given very strong this time, besides I'm too boring, I would not mind a crazy old woman with 4 cats tell me your life and give me cookies tempered at all, indeed I'm wishing for. Tomorrow I have a job interview for teleoperator phone, you know, the next time you must call the telephone to bring them to the green may be me who is listening and I do not care Revile me, I'm too boring to have it into account.

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I loaded all fucking daily design get big hands which do not call me.
was what I needed in my filthy day. I ate a package of donuts and I've taken three beaten coffee and all I got aside from feeling like Homer Simpson has been a considerable disappointment to see that did not get into my Vakero Fornarina.

Anyway, I loathe the day.

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¨ I am totally psychotic. I
· My psychiatrist has prescribed a mood stabilizer because sometimes I look like a crazy rattle and sometimes a fucking zombie.
· Makes a couple of days I fell asleep in the bathroom with a hair dryer set.
· We handle my grandfather her sleeping pills to sleep a wink and just put me so I ended up painting a different picture with nail polish.
· Today I go out partying.
Do not I get in a position to my house and I'll end up sleeping on the portal. Sa
· My grandmother has realized that I smoke around your home.
. I take pills for my grandfather to be placed in any bar.
· The whores pills have no effect.
¨ I have ironed hair.
· This revelry is dedicated to my Peter Pan, because he would like all my nights were rampant and that the Special K appeared as if by magic in my portfolio.


to see that amount today ....

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Do you think I will turn away from your side?

know me better than that
Do you think when you leave you're kneeling?


would not do that'll do you right when your wrong

If only you could see inside my

When you're cold,
I'll be there to hold you tight to me.
When you're out and can not enter.
will show you, you're better than you know ...
When you lose, when you're alone and can not return,
love will find you, I'll take back home.

If you want to mourn,
I am here to dry your eyes
And before long wills best

If you think you would leave your side,
know me better than that ...
Do you think when you leave you kneeling?

would not do that

If only you could see inside my

When you're cold I'll be there to hold you tight

When you're alone, I'll be by your side
.

Forever I'll be with you, you know me and you know, even if no one wants to caress your face because it was bloodstained other catalog of evil, I would pick her up like liquid declarations of love.
I would catch and hold your hand, knowing your burden and your past mistakes might affect my personalna and scream your heart out to the world if it were necessary that his sentence will be unable to meet.
I'm kissing you. Sorry?
were my gift, a wonderful gift she left too soon, but one is not where the body, but where more and I miss you I miss you so, you're still here with me.

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Then smoked hashish lying in bed, I watched from the sofa in front when he got to relax for a few minutes and say, 'Cinderella, you're my relief, my balm, I realized that I'm only quiet when you are with me side 'and I smiled.
Do you know that every pore of my body breathes love and affection for you?
'Thanks for everything you're doing for my'
'My Peter Pan, I do nothing, the butterflies have returned and have more colors than I could ever dream ...' Why
Cinderella? Why spend your time on me? I'm finished ...
* Because I love you more than you ever could think, my commitment to you is total. Remember? If you jump I jump *

sometimes cut shaving,comprovar my hands over and over again to make sure he had no wounds and infect my body was impossible, then let me heal the wounds, Acari gently, do not allow people to even brush against you, always elusive as a cat.

died on 13 is a traffic accident and left me alone.
immense suffering that the soul never thought I could hurt so much.
My life is tinged with the color and there is no consolation.
Someone decided that her suffering was enough.
Someone decided to test the more I was able to suffer.
And I've lost, and I'm lost.
Now I just hope the day I can return to take his hands.

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The arrows do not exist. There
love which goes beyond your body and your mind in seconds. But if there is that chemistry. Feelings of Attraction
purely chemical your body releases when seeing another person.
Then you begin to realize that maybe you smile at a time, drink a cup of coffee at the same time or decide priest and smoking a cigarette at a time. Here
instant attraction, all our body points to the fact that this subject well and gives us his side of love hormones liberated.

can say that this started all this.
is 15 years older than me, a past full of mistakes, one would have described his life as waste, and diseaseDad incurable HIV
Nobody could understand it, all would be made against it, but every time I touches my heart beat again and the butterflies flying in my stomach with more colors than ever.

A special person. In your head you will find constellations, chemistry, trees, flowers and their beloved mountains, I'd like to find out all and love every second that his side.

I know he feels the same and I know you know about this off-limits in which we increasingly sure of that somehow we'll both injured. But like me, does not care.

For love is blind and crazy in love do not realize the sweetfollies committed in its name.

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two weeks ago tried to kill myself.

I took two boxes of sleeping pills, two trankimacines and one of Seroxat. After that, I prepared a bath for half an hour telling them to start to take effect and the appearance of seizures and drowsiness, then go into coma and die, as I was not quite sure I could handle what vomiting, loving my slender body immersed in hot water bath and took a razor blade, looked at my left wrist and I made three deep cuts without thinking too much.

with hot water veins bleed more intensely and began the first sensationsaza where the wind hits and I can see the sky, and as smoke, my ideas will have come and like the wind just for frozen me in the face and the music in my ears thunder, eternally grateful to have survived.


PS: I love my Apple 30 GB iPod full of Queer as Folk and lovely songs. Today I cut my hair.